Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Empower Yourself with a Reality Check!
Empower Yourself with a Reality Check! The power to move forward by embracing what is. Recently, while talking to friends or clients, I've heard the phrase "it is what it is" several times - and even found myself using it to encourage others. I have learned that when a theme repeats itself, sometimes there is a message in it and it's wise to pay attention. Perhaps you are reading this today because "it is what it is" is a theme that applies to a challenge you currently face. Whether at work or home, in your finances or health, things don't always unfold just as you would like. Often, the smartest, least stressful approach you can take is to accept that "it is what it is." You may wish it were different. Perhaps it should be different. But it isn't. When you accept the reality of a situation rather than ruminating over what "should be," you empower yourself to come up with solutions to move forward. No longer stuck in the past, you are free to focus your energy on improving the situation for the future. You don't blame anyone. You simply accept the thing you cannot change and go about changing the things you can. How does this message apply to you? Perhaps you are dealing with a co-worker or boss who is unreasonable. They are always unreasonable and you aren't going to be able to change them. It is what it is. What will you do to preserve your sanity when dealing with this person? Perhaps you'll choose to stop trying to prove a point or stop engaging in debates with them. Maybe someone has treated you unfairly and refuses to apologize or see things from your point of view. It is what it is. Save yourself undue drama and make the changes you need to make to protect yourself from being treated that way in the future. Perhaps you are struggling with a health issue or financial challenges. It is what it is. You may need to grieve what has been lost so you can focus on rebuilding now. Do what you need to do. "It is what it is" is a statement that releases you from the need to analyze, manipulate or change a situation in order to have peace. It acknowledges that life isn't perfect - nor does it need to be in order for you to have joy. Your happiness doesn't have to be dependent upon what happens. Your emotions don't have to be tossed to and fro at the whim of others' behavior. Take a deep breath and remind yourself of all that you have to be grateful for. You can choose peace in any moment. Doing so is not always easy, but it is always possible. Coach yourself: In what situation is it time to accept a reality that you don't want to accept? What would it look like to let go? What shift will you have to make to move forward in a positive way? Valorie Burton is a professional life coach, speaker and bestselling author of several books, including Why Not You? 28 Days to Authentic Confidence. Subscribe to her popular inspirational e-newsletter at valorie.burton.com Shared via AddThis