Saturday, October 30, 2010
Monday, October 25, 2010
Love is like sunshine. It brings a golden glow to its beholder's face and a warm feeling all over the body. It awakens souls and opens eyes. And when it's over, it leaves billions of small memories called stars. To remind the world, that it still exists.
Friday, October 22, 2010
Intimacy is key in a marriage relationship. Intimacy is not just about having a satisfying sexual experience with your spouse. Intimacy in a marriage is also about a deeper friendship, companionship, spiritual meaning, fun, passion, parenting, and connection with mutual core values
Women seek intimacy in the form of verbal communication. They want to talk about their day, their plans, their dreams, and their wants. After expressing all of the above, they in turn expect for the husband to feel a need to reciprocate, and be just as enthusiastic about it. Men on the other hand define having intimate moments when they are sharing activities that they enjoy with their spouse. As part of their commitment to one another, couples should invest the time and conversations necessary to facilitate these needs. Assuming what your partner likes and perceives as intimacy based on their gender and past is not wise and can be detrimental.
It is hard to deny that commitment, communication, and intimacy are foundational basics to a healthy marriage relationship. These three functions overlap, resurface, and play their own individual roles in a marriage. Couples committed to being together “for better or for worse”, through thick and thin, with the necessary legwork are buying into a happier and healthier future. With their attention to commitment, couples will thrive on their communication skills, where they will not only bond with each other, but, be able to learn their partners as they further mature, and be able to work through rough situations, while bringing them to a higher level of intimacy.
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Monday, October 18, 2010
Lack of communication is one of the primary reasons marriages fail. It is necessary that couples learn to communicate and listen to one another effectively. Communication of all the foundational skills is of most importance. There will be times in a marriage when spouses cannot help one another. There will always be times when all you can do for someone you love is listen. There will be times when all someone can give to you is a hug. It is estimated that when awake, we spend approximately 70% our time communicating, 30% of which is talking
There are 3 goals, in my opinion, partners should start out with and keep in mind when communicating. First, as part of their commitment to one another, partners should be honest with one another. If we want something, we need to say it. It sounds obvious, but how many hurt and angry couples end the relationship over, "he should have known..." or "she should have realized..."? How would he have known? How would she have realized? Did you tell him/her? Being able to express oneself in the small areas will lead the way to open and comfortable discussion in the bigger areas as well. Second, do not rely on intuition. It is a common assumption that prophetic power is proof of your spouse's undying love and devotion
Friday, October 15, 2010
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
The most important part of any marriage is a good foundation. A relationship like many other things is on shaky ground, without a foundation. A marriage relationship is not any different, in the sense that, in order to have a healthy marriage a foundation has to be laid. A foundation of constant nurturing in commitment to one another and the bigger picture. Nurturing of communication between partners. And nurturing of the intimacy in the relationship.
Commitment to one another is a much more broader function than the world tends to teach us when it comes to marriage. At first thought, commitment is being loyal to one another in a monogamous relationship. At a second glance we are taught that being committed is being supportive, understanding and open to our partners. Dr. Robin Smith points out in her book, Lies at The Altar that commitment goes so far beyond these two points. Commitment begins with the realization of self and being committed enough in your marriage to not lose yourself. Realizing that a marriage is a union of love between two unique individuals. Partners need to honestly ask if they are in love with their partner as they are now or do you love them for who you can pray, nag, or manipulate them into being.
Being committed also means understanding that you as a partner are no longer living by yourself; you're now living in a two-fold lifestyle
In summary, commitment is the legwork of the mairrage. Marriage is not fifty-fifty. A strong marriage foundation is built when both partners put 100% into making their spouses happy, being in it for the long haul. This means that each partner needs to agree to not fight destructively, to commit oneself to keeping the funand friend ship in the relationship, and to make the relationship a safe emotional harbor